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Post by Kent Yellow on Dec 17, 2010 22:35:50 GMT
Do you ever get lonely on this thread, Gav? Not at all. If anyone likes reading it fine, if they don't well I'm not trying to upset anyone am I? Whoever mentioned getting upset? Or is Gavin getting his pants all wet? No offence was intented but Gavin's offended So I won't post any more for just yet
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Post by Gavin Archery on Dec 18, 2010 8:25:30 GMT
I'm not offended of that I'll confirm, Nothing on here will make me squirm, Please feel free to post a rhyme, Or it will be just me all the time.......
:-)
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Post by Gavin Archery on Dec 21, 2010 14:49:14 GMT
Darts is a sport and the Power is the best, He gets 180 and then bangs his chest, He is so good he has been world champion 15 times, But he has never been the subject before of one of my rhymes......
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Post by Paul Cannell on Dec 21, 2010 15:16:16 GMT
Dear Gavin, darts is just a pastime, like tiddlywinks, golf and your fine rhymes. It's not true at all that you're McGonagall, But your scansion is quite like his at times.
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Post by Gavin Archery on Dec 21, 2010 15:47:41 GMT
I was playing darts in the work canteen, And doing impressions of Mr Bean, I scored 140 then a double five, And beat my 50 year old colleague, Clive.....
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Post by Gavin Archery on Dec 21, 2010 15:56:31 GMT
At the works christmas party I was dancing with Jane, The girl from accounts with the lower back pain, I whispered in her ear i could offer her relief, But she said she hadn't a bowel problem, and I wasn't Gillian McKeith.
Part 1
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Post by Gavin Archery on Dec 21, 2010 15:59:02 GMT
After being blown out by Jane, I then danced with Greta, Well Jane was Ok but I thought I could do better, After kissing and groping we were aroused to a fever, And I forsaw "A naked Gun moment" with a beaver.
Part 2
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Post by Gavin Archery on Dec 21, 2010 16:02:30 GMT
Greta's boyfriend arrived to take her back in his car, So I asked Laura for a dance and she smiled and said "ta", 3rd time lucky and I was up for some fun, And I felt like I'd been in a 100m race, and won.......
To be continued
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Post by Gavin Archery on Dec 21, 2010 16:50:06 GMT
I climbed Everest but gave up halfway, The air was to thin and I couldn't breathe at the end of the day, At least I tried so hold me head up high, Even if I didn't make it i can say I had a try.
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Post by Gavin Archery on Dec 22, 2010 14:51:34 GMT
I got in a fight to establish who was the best, The other gorilla was a big boy with a very hairy chest, He roared and threw a big lump of wood, So I punched him in the goolies, just because i could........
Hmmmmmmm.
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Post by Gavin Archery on Dec 22, 2010 14:54:40 GMT
I like playing poker and usually win, I've got a good poker face but sport a sarcastic grin, I've made millions in gambling and want to retire, But love playing and just keep raising the stakes higher.
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Post by Gavin Archery on Dec 22, 2010 14:59:31 GMT
I enjoy walking on the beach with my girlfriend Jo, We make love in the dunes before we have to go, When we get back we have a nice cup of tea, With a dunking digestive, my Jo and me.
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Post by Gavin Archery on Dec 22, 2010 15:05:29 GMT
I like going to air shows and marvelling at each plane, When one show is over i can't wait to go again, The roar of the jets makes the hairs on my back, Stick up, and my balls jangle in their sack.
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Post by Gavin Archery on Dec 22, 2010 15:36:11 GMT
I like the smell of creosote, I makes me very happy, I hate the smell of vomit or a freshly soiled babies' nappy, I like the smell of roast chicken and sage and onion stuffing, But best of all a steam train as it passes me by and chuffing.
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Post by Gavin Archery on Jan 1, 2011 9:20:10 GMT
Happy 2011 to all on this board, Particularly to Wilder, our saviour and lord, OUFC are climbing the table and play offs beckon, If we keep the momentum, It's promotion I reckon......
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Post by Gavin Archery on Jan 1, 2011 10:04:46 GMT
How much extra weight have I put on? Half a stone, my six pack now gone, New Year diet to lose all the fat, Buy some weights and an exercise mat.
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Post by Gavin Archery on Jan 2, 2011 11:38:17 GMT
I think we were well beaten yesterday, Southend controlled the game in a dominant way, We were inept and deserved what we got, No f**king points and a smack on the bot......
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Post by chuckbert on Jan 2, 2011 13:40:01 GMT
Dear Gav, It's nice that you should let us read your poetic wares. But you sound like a dodgy Victoria Wood who's been crossed with a ropey Pam Ayres.
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Post by Gavin Archery on Jan 4, 2011 14:35:41 GMT
I'm not dodgy but like the comparison with Ms Wood, I would like to be a writer if I possibly could, I like to rhyme and I like to be rude And i like to think my rhymes are viewed.
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Post by Gavin Archery on Jan 4, 2011 16:06:26 GMT
I want to hang glide from a mountain top, Beginning to run and then not being able to stop, The equipment will carry me away like a bird, But the fear of crashing will produce a small turd. :-)
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